you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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