Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
