I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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