People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
sex in a hospital.. check
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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