STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
