Buhtt sex?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
