i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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