thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
