I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
