you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize