i don't like sucking hair
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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