I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize