When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
