We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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