If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
