The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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