I hope my margaritas pass through security.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
