Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
smell my finger.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
