Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
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OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
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Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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