party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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