If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
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