and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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