Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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