i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
