My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
