I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Randomize
