I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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