Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
