I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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