I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
