You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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