My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
