East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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