i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I love you. Go after that dick
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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