i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I looked at my own cervix.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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