i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
