I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
