i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
