Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
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