these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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