i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
