it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
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