the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
