I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
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We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
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One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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