what if every blade of grass was a penis?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
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My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
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Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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