The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
