It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
