Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
