I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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