I just cut my nipple shaving
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
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