im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
