Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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